Ekaterina

     If you have ever been to a circus which moves from place to place you must have seen those pitiful animals in cages. They look at you from the cage so sadly and hopelessly. I always felt like letting them out. Have you ever come to think what is on their minds? Just a while ago my life was not that different from the existence of the pour animals. This is how it all started.
     The majority of youth are all grown-up nowadays, and I was no exception. Cigarettes and alcohol are already there as early as at the age of 14. Having my own opinion about everything, I would not listen to adults. When I was 18 I had a boyfriend 9 years older than me, a job and grown-up friends. Heroin appeared out of the blue and was tried without thinking twice. You never take time to think when young after all. But total chaos follows quickly. It’s hard now to recall the train of all things that took place and hurts to bring up the past.
     My 21st Birthday: I’m lying down not wanting to see or even hear anyone… withdrawal cravings.
     New Year’s: my used-to-be-loved one and I at the table with just two little cakes on… each holding a syringe… cravings in the morning again. Lies alone, misunderstandings and frictions with relatives… they didn’t know a thing yet at the time. My life…: waiting constantly for money to come in or next dose or a drug pusher. I didn’t remember any longer what it was like to live in a different way.
      For a long time I was convinced I would be able to quit at any moment. The thing though is you are shortly on the junk again, those around you dying from overdose or blood-poisoning, or locked up. My relatives surely did their best fighting to get me back to the normal life. However, once you have branded yourself “drug-addict” others can barely help it. But there is Someone Who has enough power to set you free from any kind of dependency and brand.
     The light broke into my life when the darkness concentration had already reached 100%. I lost my mother. I wouldn’t reconcile to her absolutely unexpected death. Her sister, my aunt, again reached out with a life ring. By the time, she had been a believer for years. Having learned in the church of a drug rehab center, she bought me a bus ticket and in a month time after my mum’s death I found myself in the center. I didn’t plan on staying there for a long time and the strict regulations, God talks and many other things only catalyzed my desire to leave. No one was forcing me to stay after all, there were no locks or cages there.
     In a week, I simply opened up to the pastor of the local church who came to have a fellowship with us on the day. He prayed for me and left. The very next day my life changed. That morning a sudden long-forgotten feeling of love and tenderness arose deep down in my frozen heart. It flooded me and washed away my skepticism. That morning, after eight years of drug abuse and lots of losses, I died… died and was born again absolutely different. My God transformed me and taught to trust again and enjoy life without any kind of doping. I wish my mother could see it.
     Upon completing my rehab course I decided against going back to Chelyabinsk and went to Ekaterinburg to study in the Bible school. I met many great people in different cities. And then one day I met Aleksey, my future husband.
     Today, our lives are in God’s hands. We live and work in the center, where my husband took a rehabilitation course as well, to help those who used to be like.